Orsm.net on Facebook Orsm.net on Instagram Orsm.net on Twitter
orsmupdate 2016.10.20-18.02

Welcome to melancholic orgasm.

I feel like the world is so engaged with the US Election that maybe we should all get a vote. Sure, campaigning in 195 countries might make things a little tricky for the candidates but as most people will tell you: "the outcome directly affects me!" Seems only fair, Americans!

I don't even know where to begin with my life's activities of the past week. Shit has been nonstop. Well the weekend was; the week not as much. The most interesting thing that's happened in the last couple was this morning. Have often said the place I'll probably die is on a particular stretch I walk along in peak hour. Was plodding through there today when I heard a very loud screech of tyres which instinctively made me jump. Surely this was my time but nope... a car had indeed locked it wheels but on the other side of the road, three lanes away. I'd have been able to run to a cafe, grab a coffee and return before it hit me. My earphones and Taylor Swift messed with the sound making me think it was coming from behind and I didn't in fact die at all. If you saw a fit, handsome fat fuck randomly jump for no reason on your way to work this morning... that was someone else.

Moving on... Saturday began like all good days do and should - motherfucking eggs; scrambled if you must know. Obviously like every Saturday from now back to the dawn of time it was rained out. Unbelievable. Pottered around most of the morning doing whatever including helping the GF work on a wedding cake and cupcakes for a friend's wedding later on. Then about an hour before the ceremony came a knock at the door. T'was the groom and co asking to get ready at our place. Of course come on in! Good on them but I COULD NOT roll this way. For such an important event I'd have a plan plus a backup plan plus a failsafe and would not be so calm if my shit got messed up. Anyway we sorted that and rushed off to deliver the cakes then came back to the bombsite house to get showered and ready.

We also had driving duties for the bridal party which, for a bunch of reasons I shan't go in to, lead to me finding out halfway through the ceremony a few people would be coming back to our place before the reception. "Umm exsqueeze me? A baking powder?" So again it's important to point out the house was a pigsty. There was cake decorating stuff, toys, clothes and just shit everywhere. Everywhere. So I raced back home the moment the ceremony was over and employed a cleaning technique called "Pick everything up, chuck it in the spare room and close the door". Also had to squeeze in a trip to the shops to grab nibbles and return to transport everyone back in not that much time. It was a mission and managed to pull it off with no one any the wiser...

Next up was the reception. Drove the crew there, ran around most of the night with my camera and had a nice time despite knowing pretty much no one there. We made it home exhausted at half 9 and collapsed in bed. For a wedding I expected to just roll up to and sit quietly, it was an exceptional amount of effort. This does not encourage me to get married...

Sunday was supposed to be breakfast with mates but didn't happen. This freed up my morning as GF and kid took off to do whatever wherever. Sooo... baked a loaf of bread from scratch. Then mowed the lawn. Gardened. Hosed down outside area. Cleaned windows. Sorted all the recycling. Sprayed weeds. Pulled weeds. Snail pelleted everywhere. Finally found all the Jenga blocks. Did 4 loads of laundry. Plus a whole bunch of other stuff including sunburning the top of my head. Been forever since that's happened!

By this point I was wrecked. Hadn't got around to eating at all and Saturday's activities were catching up with me... but still resisted the urge to cancel. Thank you Red Bull. A mate collected me around 2.30 and we headed south to Fremantle for a going away party. If I'm being honest, ignoring that the buzz hit me on just the second pint was a terrible idea. Furthermore, carelessly moving on to wine and inhaling it just as quickly was even more stupiderer. Skip forward to mid-evening we were well beyond messy. The ride home even included a few unscheduled and urgent stops so my drinking buddy could purge. One such stop resulted in a severe ankle injury. Totally worth it though. As was the shocking hangover. Isn't often I get to pump out a boozy Sunday session and if that means one of my mates has to suffer pain and the inconvenience of being on crutches for a few months, so be it...

Alllllrighty then. Let's get going with the update. Goes without saying I worked my b-hole off on this one and whilst you may not care... who am I kidding... of course you do. This update rocks. That is all. Check it...

Click for more awesomeness

TerrifyingFrightening Moment Great White Shark Got Inside Cage With A Person Inside- The GambleA Guide To The World Of Online Casinos And The Future Of Gambling—Everything You Need To Know - Get A Life!!Nosy Neighbours Try To Get This Guy's Garage Shut Down - Drunk & HighCanna Vine Is Weed-Infused Wine, Meaning You Can Get High And Drunk At The Same Time - OMG STOP NOW!Bar Fights Back Against Customer’s Negative Review And It Totally Backfires - Great BoobsA Few Beautiful Naked Breasts Secretly Filmed On Carefree And Nude Beaches In The South Of France - Huge LoserThe Misadventures Of "Cuck Finn" And His Stallion, Andrew. Today They Breed A Mega Whale-Beast For Recreation. Mistakes Are Made, Disagreements Are Had And Boners Are Killed Over Some "Dumbass Pictures". - Swift KickAll You Need Is A Kick To The Face- F-ing LameReporter Accidentally Outs Fake Martial Arts Master

Butter QueenBlonde Girl Deepthroats Stick Of Butter, Swallows It In One Gulp - Flaps SlipCharlotte Dawson No Panties In See-Thru Skirt - Beach HottieBikini Babe Nici Dee Drops The Bikini In A Lifeguard Tower At The Beach And Goddamn Does She Look Good!! Perfect Body And Her Tits Are Looking Perky As Fuck. - Figure HuggingJessica Biel In Fetish Gear - Cringey!!Emmy Award Winning Porn Acting - Tasty TeenPetite Teen Destroyed By Two Monster Cocks. - Disgusting PigThere's No Limits To The Deviant Deeds This Psychotic Slut Will Perform, And Her Pussy Explodes Like A Bursting Water Main! - Mouth VaginaIf She Isn't Crying While Deepthroating Your Cock, Then She's Doing It Wrong - Hawt FacialGuy Splashes Cum All Over The Face Of This Cute Asian Teen

Am I Normal?Nowadays, Asking The Creepy Janitor Guy About Dicks Is Considered Weird. But Back In The Day, He Was The Go To Guy For Good Penis Info. - BabaricHead Instead Of Ball - Inmates Play Soccer In Prison Yard - Seeya BroQuestionable Video Shows, What Appears To Be A Group Bullying A Single Man Before Throwing Him Dick-First Into A Passing Bus. - Dancer NipsMisty Copeland Is A Pretty, Amazing And Celebrated American Dancer Who Is Ripped, Fit And Flexible... And Also Famous On Instagram Which Is The Key To All Things In This World. - BJ ChampionIs There Such A Thing As A Cock Sucking Champion? There Is Now! - Free SexPetite Redlight Hooker Fucks A Tourist - Fuck MidgetsIf There's One Video You Must Watch Today... A Freaky Midget Getting Blown Has To Be The One! - Killer CleavThe Sexy Kara Del Toro Walked The Red Carpet For The Premiere Of American Pastoral! Sexy Dress That Pretty Much Looks Like Fancy Lingerie. Great Cleavage. - Fashion TitsBella Hadid Braless In See Through Dress For Fashion Week

A little boy was in the bath with his mum. The boy said "What's that hairy thing, mommy?" She replied "That is my sponge". "Oh yes" said the boy "The babysitter has got one too. I've seen her washing dad's face with it".
In a tiny village lived an old maid. In spite of her old age, she was still a virgin. She was very proud of it. She knew her last days were getting closer, so she told the local undertaker that she wanted the following inscription on her tombstone: "Born as a virgin, lived as a virgin, died as a virgin". Not long after, the old maid died peacefully, and the undertaker told his men what the lady had said. The men went to carve it in, but the lazy no-goods they were, they thought the inscription to be unnecessarily long. They simply wrote: "Returned unopened".
I'm about three years into my relationship now and I've started to have erection difficulties. My girlfriend and I have different ideas as to what the problem is: she bought me some Viagra and I bought her a treadmill.
Little Billy asks his dad for a telly in his room. Dad reluctantly agrees. Next day Billy comes downstairs and asks "Dad, what's love juice?" Dad looks horrified and tells Billy all about sex. Billy just sat there with his mouth open in amazement. Dad says "So what were you watching?" Billy says "Wimbledon".


Click for more awesomeness


What I love about this exhaustive list of shits you can take is that we as a society felt the need to make one. So here it is... every type of shit you can possibly have/do/take...

THE GHOST SHIT: You know you've shit. There's shit on the toilet paper, but no shit in the bowl.

THE TEFLON COATED SHIT: Comes out so slick, clean and easy that you don't feel it. No traces of shit on the toilet paper, you have to look in the bowl to be sure you did it!

THE PERFECT DUMP: Every once in a while everyone experiences the perfect dump. It's rare but a real thing of beauty. You sit down expecting the worse, but what you get is a smooth sliding, fart-less masterpiece that breaks the water with the splash-less grace of an Olympic high-diving champion. You use the toilet tissue to find that it was totally unnecessary. It makes you feel that all is right in the world and that you are in perfect harmony with it.

THE GOOEY SHIT: This has the consistency of hot tar. You wipe your ass 12 times and it still doesn't come clean. You end up putting toilet paper in your underwear so you don't stain it. This shit leaves permanent skid marks in the toilet.

THE BEER SHIT: Nasty! Depends upon the dumper's tolerance and is the result of too many beers - doesn't matter if it was 2 or 22. What you get is a sinister, lengthy, noisy dump accompanied by an odious malevolent fog that could close the bathroom for days. Naked flames are ill advised...

THE SECOND THOUGHT SHIT: You're all done wiping your ass and you're about to stand up when you realise it... you've got some more.

THE POP A VEIN IN YOUR FOREHEAD SHIT: This kind is the kind of shit that killed Elvis. It doesn't come until you're all sweaty, trembling and purple from straining so hard.

THE EMPTY ROLL: Relief - you've finished and reach for the tissue only to find an empty cardboard cylinder staring back at you. Panic overcomes you. You could use the curtains but then someone would ask "Where are the curtains?" Use the rug? Nah, too bulky and cumbersome. You then come to the same conclusion that every Empty Roll Dumper must face... pull up your pants, tighten your cheeks and shuffle to the nearest loo roll. Failing that you could always use your shirt-tail or one of your socks!

THE BALI BELLY SHIT: You shit so much you lose 5 kilos. An Indonesian delicacy.

THE RIGHT NOW SHIT: You better be within 10 seconds of a toilet. Usually it has its head out before you get your pants down.

THE WHOLE ROLL CRAP: No matter how much you wipe, it just isn't enough. You blow the whole roll and have to flush at least a half dozen times. The whole episode is consumer waste. Eventually if your toilet paper runs into minimal supply anything will do, towels, wash clothes, carpet, walls - whatever it takes.

THE KING KONG OR COMMODE CHOKER SHIT: This shit is so big that you know it won't go down the toilet unless you break it into smaller chunks. A coat hanger works well. This kind of shit usually happens at someone else's house.

THE WISH SHIT: You sit there all cramped up and fart a few times, but no shit!

THE SPLASH BACK: This one drops like a depth charge creating a column of cold water that washes your sphincter with a startlingly unpleasant shock. Now you're wet and have toilet running water up your back. Tip: blot don't wipe.

THE CEMENT BLOCK OR OH GOD SHIT: You wish you'd gotten a spinal block before you shit.

THE SNAKE SHIT: This shit is fairly soft and about as big around as your thumb and at least three feet long.

THE ENCORE: Ahhh, you're done, so you wipe, dress, flush, wash hands and are about to leave the auditorium when you feel another dump coming on. You must therefore return for a curtain call.

THE FLOATER SHIT: Even after the third flush, it's still floating in there. My god! How do I get rid of it? This shit usually happens at someone else's house.

THE BEER DRUNK SHIT: This happens the day after the night before. Normally your shit doesn't smell too bad, but this shit is BAD. Usually there's somebody standing outside to use the bathroom. This kind of shit also usually happens at someone else's house.

THE CHILLI DUMP (AKA THE JAPANESE FLAG): Hot when it goes in and napalm when it comes out. It stays with you all day stinging your butthole and generally making your choccie starfish feel like the Shuttle's heat shield. Also makes your ass look like "a Japanese Flag".

THE FRIGHTENED TURTLE: The kind of shit that just pokes its head out then quickly goes back in

THE BUNGEE SHIT: The kind of shit that just hangs off your ass before it falls into the water.

THE CHILDBIRTH SHIT: This one is just too big to go through the aperture provided by nature. You sit there thinking over your dilemma. First it hurts, and then gets no better. You sweat violently and wonder if you'll ever see your loved ones again. You imagine the newspaper headlines screaming "Man dies giving birth!" There are only three things you can do: 1. Scream 2. Call an Obstetrician 3. Hope to hell you've got some Vaseline to help you get through it.

THE RING OF FIRE SHIT: The kind of shit where you eat really spicy food and your asshole feels like the inside of a cigarette lighter.

THE CRIPPLER: The kind of shit where you have to sit on the toilet so long your legs go numb from the waist down.

THE CLING-ON TURD: You've finished but there's one damn morsel that refuses to drop. You grip the seat with both hands and wriggle. You twist and pump but the little bastard just hangs there, suspended, clinging like a canned peach between you and the water below. If only you had some scissors...

THE BIG BOBBER TURD: The kind of shit that no matter how many times you flush it always floats back to the surface.

THE SHITTY SHITTY BANG BANG SHIT: The kind of shit that hits you when you're trapped in your car in a traffic jam.

THE MACHINE GUN POOP: Best utilised in public conveniences. You sit there in sublime peace when suddenly you emit a group of noisy gassy bursts that break the tranquillity like machine gun fire. The guy in the next cubicle hits the floor like a Vietnam veteran, cradling his umbrella like a M16... damn commies.

THE INCREDIBLE HULK SHIT: The king of shit that sits in the toilet overnight and mysteriously expands to twice its normal size.

THE JACK THE RIPPER SHIT: The kind of shit that yanks out the hair of your ass as it pushes its way out.

THE SOUND EFFECT: You feel a noisy one coming on but relatives, friends or work mates are within earshot. So, you must employ some clever techniques to cover the disgusting sounds you are about to emit. Timing is of the essence. At the precise moment of release, try the following: 1. Flush the toilet 2. Drop loose change on the floor, 3. Cough loudly in time with each release.

THE PARTY POOPER: The giant shit you take at a party. And when you flush the toilet, you watch in horror as the water starts to rise.

THE TOXIC GAS SHIT: The kind of shit that makes you pass out and fall of the toilet before you finish, and then you wake up in some strange South American town.

THE DIRTY BOWL SHIT: The kind of shit that comes out in a million pieces a second, reminiscent of an avalanche - but with rocket propulsion, and splatters all over the toilet bowl.

THE WINDY CITY SHIT: When you sit down, and fart for so long and hard that you no longer need to take a shit.

THE OH SHIT! SHIT: You shit so much and wipe your ass so furiously you run out of toilet paper and you say OH SHIT!

THE NEVER ENDING SHIT: It's the shit that keeps running out of your ass like pea, and just when you start wiping your ass your stomach gargles and splash, more shit runs out. This always happens after eating at Kentucky Fried Chicken.

THE OUCH THAT HURT SHIT: The type of shit that leaves you feeling like you just hoped onto a bicycle without a seat. Sensation usually lasts hours.



Love Me Some Vagina: #1 - #2 - #3 - #4 - #5 - #6 - #7 - #8

There was once this guy who liked to travel from pub to pub across the countryside. One day, he came up to a pub he had never heard of. He went inside and sat at the bar.

"What'll it be?" asked the bartender. "A beer thanks, but what's that jar?" he said pointing up to a jar on the top shelve. "Well, anyone who can drink it wins the collected prize money, which stands at around $80 right now" said the bartender. "What's in it?" the man asked. "Used to be a spittoon, everyone spat in the thing as a joke and now were looking for a brave man".

The man looked around at all the people watching attentively "No that's a bit much for me I think". Then suddenly people from in the pub started betting money on it. "Come on! Give it a go!" said people from the bar. Before the man knew it the bet had gone up to $500! The bartender brought the jar down from its shelf. People by then were yelling and chanting for the guy to do it.

Then with consideration "I'll drink it!" said the man. Screams of encouragement came from all around. He unscrewed the top of the jar and picked it up off the bar. Everyone in the pub fell silent. The man lifted it to his mouth and started drinking it. The sight was horrible! People everywhere were looking at him drinking all the phlegm and couldn't believe it.

"Stop, its making me feel ill!" said one of the people in the bar. Then other people started yelling out, begging the man to stop, but he didn't! "Don't worry about the money, we'll give it all to you! Just stop drinking it!!" came from the audience of patrons.

But he didn't stop!

Finally, he had finished it, and dropped the jar onto the floor. People in the pub were vomiting and dizzy. One then came up to the man "Why didn't you stop!? I said we would give you the money!" The man, green in the face looked up and said "I couldn't... it was all one piece!"


Click for more awesomeness

An Irishman, a Mexican and a redneck were doing construction work on the scaffolding of a tall building. They were eating lunch. The Irishman said "Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building!"

The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed "Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time, I'm going to jump off too!"

Then the redneck opened his lunch and said "Bologna again. If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too!"

The next day the Irishman opens his lunch box, sees corned beef and cabbage and jumps to his death. The Mexican opens his lunch, sees a burrito and jumps too. The redneck opens his lunch, sees the bologna and jumps to his death as well.

At the funeral, the Irishman's wife is weeping. She says "I I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!" The Mexican's wife also weeps and says "I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn't realise he hated burritos so much".

Everyone turned and stared at the redneck's wife. "Hey, don't look at me" she said. "He makes his own lunch".



ASIAN GIRLS: Gallery #1 - Gallery #2 - Gallery #3 - Gallery #4 - Gallery #5 - Gallery #6 - Gallery #7

Why is MyFreeCams.com one of the most awesome websites in the history of forever? Firstly, there are hundreds of hot models online at any given time AND you can watch their live webcam feed in HQ with sound AND chat. Secondly, you don't need a credit card or have to install any dodgy software - it's all absolutely free! And finally, why do I sound so fucking excited? Because MyFreeCams really is that brilliant. Click here to check it out now!

Click for more awesomeness


A guy decides he wants to learn how to hunt. Needing a good hunting dog, he visits a farmer who has been advertising hounds in the newspaper. The farmer shows him several dogs, but the guy doesn't like them. Then he spots one hound that the farmer hasn't shown him.

The guys asks "What about that one?" "Oh, no" the farmer replies. "That one's my special dog". "What's so special about him?" "Let me show you".

The farmer leads the guy and the dog to a field, lifts up one of the dog's ears, and orders "Go find the birds!" The dog charges to a nearby bush, points and barks once. "That means there's one bird in that bush" says the farmer. "No way!" exclaims the guy. The farmer takes a stick and pokes the bush, and a huge pheasant flies out.

To further convince the guy, the farmer again lifts the dog's ear and repeats "Go find the birds!" This time the dog streaks off to another bush, points, and barks twice. "That means there's two birds in there" says the farmer, taking his stick and poking at the bush. Two huge pheasants pop out and fly away.

"I've gotta have that dog!" says the man. "Well, okay" replies the farmer. "But it's gonna cost you a bundle". The guy forks over the bucks and takes the dog.

A month later, the farmer has to go to the city and decides to visit the guy who bought his prize hound. When he asked the guy about the dog, the man replies "A couple of buddies and I went hunting, and when we got to a field the damnedest thing happened. I went up to the dog, lifted one of his ears, and said 'Go find the birds.' The dog took off like a bat outta hell and ran into the field, barking and running around like crazy. Then he jumped on my leg and started humping it like I was a bitch in heat. After that, he grabbed a stick and started shaking it violently at me! I thought he'd gone nuts for sure, or maybe had rabies or something. So I shot the fucker".

"You blithering idiot!" yelled the farmer. "He was just telling you that there's more fuckin' birds out there than you could shake a stick at!"

Click for more awesomeness


Want to contribute to Orsm? Just click here and do eeeet!!

A young college student had stayed up all night studying for his zoology test the next day. As he entered the classroom, he saw ten stands with ten birds on them with a sack over each bird and only the legs showing. He sat right on the front row because he wanted to do the best job possible.

The professor announced that the test would be to look at each of the birds' legs and give the common name, habitat, genus, species, etc. The student looked at each of the birds' legs. They all looked the same to him. He began to get upset. He had stayed up all night studying and now had to identify birds by their legs. The more he thought about it the madder he got.

Finally, he could stand it no longer. He went up to the professor's desk and said "What a stupid test! How could anyone tell the difference between birds by looking at their legs?" With that the student threw his test on the professor's desk and walked to the door. The professor was surprised. The class was so big that he didn't know every student's name, so as the student reached the door the professor called "Mister, what's your name!"

The enraged student pulled up his pants legs and said "You guess, buddy! You guess!"



A man observed a woman in the grocery store with a three year old girl in her basket. As they passed the cookie section, the little girl asked for cookies and her mother told her "No". The little girl immediately began to whine and fuss, and the mother said quietly "Now Monica, we just have half of the aisles left to go through - don't be upset. It won't be long now".

Soon, they came to the candy aisle and the little girl began to shout for candy. When told she couldn't have any, she began to cry. The mother said "There there, Monica, don't cry - only two more aisles to go and then we'll be checking out".

When they finally got to the checkout stand, the little girl immediately began to clamour for gum and burst into a terrible tantrum upon discovering there'd be no gum purchased. The mother said serenely "Monica, we'll be through this checkout stand in 5 minutes and then you can go home and have a nice nap".

The man followed them out to the parking lot and stopped the woman to compliment her. "I couldn't help noticing how patient you were with little Monica" he began. The mother replied "I'm Monica - my little girl's name is Tammy".


RANDOM SHITE 2016 10 20

OLDER SHITE: 13th October - 6th October - 29th September - 22nd September - 15th September - 8th September

Click for more awesomeness

Relatives had gathered in the hospital waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and sombre.

"I'm afraid I am the bearer of bad news" he said as he surveyed the worried faces "The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, semi-risky, and you will have to pay for the brain yourselves".

The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news.

After a length of time, someone asked "Well, how much does a brain cost?" The Doctor quickly responded "$5000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain".

The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked. A man, unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask "Why is the male brain so much more?"

The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and then to the entire group said "It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains, because they've been used".



One day, all the human body parts started arguing about who was on top...

The mouth said, ''I should be on top because, without me, you wouldn't be able to eat.''

Then the stomach said, ''Ya but if it weren't for me, you wouldn't be able to digest and transfer all the minerals and vitamins throughout the body, I should be on top.''

Then the heart said, ''I should be on top because I'm the one who takes the blood from point A to point B. Without me, the body would die.''

Then the brain said, '' Well, without me, you wouldn't be able to move, eat, digest or allow circulation of blood, so I should be on top.''

Now, the asshole was beginning to get annoyed, ''You know, I should be on top because I can just shut my hole and then shit will accumulate and block the digestive track and screw all of you up.''

It was chaos, everyone was yelling and fighting. Finally, the asshole got fed up, ''That's it, I'm fed up, I'm shutting up my hole!''

So for a few days, the body couldn't shit and the brain had trouble moving, the stomach digesting, the mouth eating and the blood flow going, everyone was begging the asshole to open up, The brain said, ''Please open up, you made your point, you're on top, just open up!'' The asshole smiled, ''So everyone agrees that I'm on top?'' ''YES'' everyone shouted. ''OK!'' so the asshole opened up and the body could shit again.

The moral of this story is, you have to be an asshole to be on top...



GIRLS IN GLASSES - Gallery #1 - Gallery #2 - Gallery #3 - Gallery #4 - Gallery #5 - Gallery #6


Well here we are again...

-Follow me on Facebook and Twitter and Instagram. Fucloads of SFW stuff you see on Orsm now flows daily on to your favourite social network.
-Check out the archives. Trust me its worth it!
-Next update will be next Thursday not thursday.
-Tell your friends, family, colleagues, co-workers and neighbours to check out ORSM-DOT-NET else my friend Ray will rant and rave like a mad man in support of Donald Trump whilst railing against liar Hillary Clinton as if he was working for the Trump campaign despite being a resident of Australia and not a citizen of the United States nor ever having been there.
-Need to clear your conscience? Judge me? Want to fight me? Threaten me? Sit on my lap and talk about the first thing that pops up? Show me the twins? Then go for it! Just make sure you email me here!

Until next time be good, stay off the chems and lick the butter off. Enjoy. Mr. Orsm.