|So here is what the experts had to say about
why that Chicken did cross the road...
I don't think I should have to answer that question.
I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken
crossing the road represented the application of these two different
functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring
greater services to the American people.
The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been
polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach
the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was
crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.
I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was
getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone
out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with
crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more
of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid
for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking
about your money, money the government took from you to build roads
for chickens to cross.
No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had
a standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs when the
price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people
see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going
to the "other side." That's what they call it - the other
side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that
chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens
until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes
with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side."
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed, I've not been told!
To die. In the rain. Alone.
MARTIN LUTHER KING,
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone
told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to
the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of
how it suffered a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish
its life-long dream of crossing the road.
Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
It was a historical inevitability.
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified
in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to
the death its right to do it.
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens
have to cross before you believe it?
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed
the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads,
but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your
cheque book and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath
There is no evidence whatsoever to suggest that this chicken crossed
the road. There were no eyewitnesses to the alleged crossing, no
DNA evidence, and the single footprint found at the scene does not
match that of my client. This raises reasonable doubt as to whether
the chicken was even in the road at the time in question. Ladies
and gentlemen of the jury, I say to you: No footprint fit, you must
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by
chicken? Could you define chicken please?
Coz the chicken was a rat cock-sucker.
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken,
"Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the
road, and there was much rejoicing.
I missed one?